I just asked someone if they remember “ICQ”… they said, “no, what the hell was that?”

my internet age is showing 


   reading about the world tonight, and all these hurting people, all over…

   it’s weird to me, we can’t agree on what Love looks like.. we can’t agree on what marriage between two human beings “should” be, or what is proper care for a child.. (negligent parents leaving them in hot cars, hanging infants over balconys, etc…)… we cant agree on what proper conservation of resources should look like (wasting of water in California, USA.. all the food thrown out from the schools… dont even get me started on drinking water around the world, and how fucking spoiled us americans are, and how we take something like water for granted times 100)… we can’t agree on fair pricing, or fair markets in a ‘free economy’…corrupt Mayors draining the funds for their cities.. Im literally Praying for the healing of these children with blood on their feet, and hands… all the friends and loved ones these passed few days, or weeks.. Malaysia airlines 370, MH17, TWA flight 800, the invasion of Gaza… all the friends and loved ones that lost, and feel left behind…all the homes, and neighborhoods destroyed in places the media tries to feed lies on about Syria.. the people taking up arms against ISIS in Iraq… the 89 dead in Afghanistan this week from a suicide bomber..

   we can’t agree on what Love looks like, but we can all agree that we know what pain feels like, what suffering is… it’s a backwards ass world, and in my opinion these are some disturbing times to be living in -with best friends stabbing each other “on 3” and posting about it on twitter.. it’s a sad World tonight, and I know Marcus Aurelius would remind me that this is just history repeating itself, that this is just the nature of the World, and im beginning to wonder myself, im beginning to wonder why I expect the world to share in my hope for a peaceful future, families reuniting, and homes not getting bulldozed, children playing on a beach without worry.. im beginning to wonder why I cant just accept that clergymen, and police officers would abuse kids that live in their so called foster/safe homes… Im starting to wonder why I cant accept that the news will forever treat these things as just another story… im starting to wonder if we as a species were ever supposed to unite under Peace.. if we were ever supposed to meet there, because it sure as shit seems like things just won’t get better, it seems like we will continue to mix with the metal, and fall with our shirts half torn off… showing a fake Brazil to the rest of the world, and continue to alienate the suffering in these state run gun markets and chemical drenched streets… snipers targeting children as they walk to school.. and trust me, I know how easy it is to sound like “just another dumb American”, and im not claiming to know everything about what its like to be in some of these places throughout the world, but the pattern im seeing is getting to me, and tonight, looking at the headlines, it doesnt look like the world wants it to get better… all we can do is hope that the Evil surrender to the Good, because we’ve given so much blood, and promised too many broken futures… we can only hope that the World will realize there can be a tomorrow without War, and its just sad because I keep finding myself here, realizing that im in denial of everything that’s happening, and that the World really refuses to change.. but through the fog of all this loathing shit.. I know the World can be changed, I know we as People have a voice, I know we can change it -this year, if we choose..Tonight.. the World can know Peace, it can know silence.. the Wolves don’t always win, and it’s never too late for our population to open it’s eyes, and see that it can be over, that too many of our children and grand parents have died.. people not even associated with these bullshit agendas, caught in the crosshairs.. We can end these regimes, we can heal, and live in Peace     

   my intention with this post is not to offend, or insult anyone… please, if there is anything I am missing or wrong about, please let me know.. I am not trying to spark political debate, because wrong is just fucking wrong.. and my intention with this post is more or less to point out the pain, and suffering felt by the World at this time, and I can’t help but see the conflicts heating up, and in this state of our history, I offer a few moments of silence, and prayer to my deity about the future of our Home… may Peace and love be with you, and a blessing on your family, friends, and loved ones regardless of your race, gender, religion, orientation or political views.. We are all unique, we are all complete… please, be safe out there, and join me in a few moments of silence for the future of our World, and an acknowledgement, and expression of condolences to the innocent men, women, and children that lost their lives in Syria, Afghanistan, Gaza, Iraq, Saudi Arabia… the Iranians that were wrongfully murdered, the missing children who have been abducted or killed en-route to the borders of America, the Canadian police that were murdered for protecting noncombatant civilians.. the women that are striving for education in Egypt who are harassed EVERY FUCKING DAY on their ways to study at a MAJOR university… and prisoners of war all over the world that have been wrongfully detained… goodnight, and please keep the innocent in the forefront of your mind, because somebody is sleeping without their loved ones tonight, someone is afraid to wake tomorrow, and chances are its over some bullshit reason that has something to do with criminals that need to meet justice head on..     

“I’m too much of a creepy, negative person… A sicko… Desperate… The pathological type… Ugly, awkward, uptight, and socially retarded.” -Kurt Cobain

“I’m too much of a creepy, negative person… A sicko… Desperate… The pathological type… Ugly, awkward, uptight, and socially retarded.” -Kurt Cobain

It was on this date, 237 years ago, that America “unfollowed” England.
das bin ich auf der linken Seite … airsoft ganzen Sommer … wieder habe ich Google Übersetzer für das, weil ich nicht sprechen Deutsch

das bin ich auf der linken Seite … airsoft ganzen Sommer … wieder habe ich Google Übersetzer für das, weil ich nicht sprechen Deutsch

suchen, um nach Deutschland zu reisen

mein Name ist Bryan, und ich schreibe dies aus Corona, Kalifornien.

Im Planungs ihr in Freiburg von 20. August-20. September besuchen .. im Unterkünfte .. eine Couch zum Schlafen .. ein Zimmer .. alles für ein paar Tage … natürlich kann ich eine Verhandlungsgebühr zu zahlen. . lass es mich wissen, wenn Sie ein Kerl Blogger, ein Freund .. Id interessiert sein, zu hängen, und erfahren Sie mehr über die Kultur helfen … bitte lassen Sie mich wissen, wenn Sie helfen können, ich bin gespannt auf Reisen in diesem Sommer danke ..

und ich entschuldige mich für die Fehler in dieser Nachricht .. Ich habe google übersetzen, weil ich nicht Deutsch sprechen. ich entschuldige mich noch einmal

so I read this article by Piper Kerman, and it just got me thinking about all the Bad Girls i’ve known…  

She was letting a friend ride a skateboard in her house… we went to the bar and she got in a fight with her boyfriend.. she was wearing this Ford Cobra jacket when I first met her, turns out she was the mechanic for our dealership… we met on the bus in Yosemite, coaxed me into her truck and drove me around on this crazy scenic tour of her personal spots around the Park… and don’t even get me started on KnowPhest in L.A., 2013…  cool ass girls, and these are all separate incidents, but im talking like the whole Riot Grrrl thing thats going down here in America, up there in Oregon, Washington area.. Pussy Riot going to prison in Russia, getting released and opening the eyes of the World to some of the injustice in society, some of the unbalanced expectations, and trends in crime in our present age… as a dude, sometimes im pretty stupid, sometimes im pretty stubborn.. sometimes I feel alot of shit, but I literally cannot put it into words (there’s a physiological, and biological explanation for this…), and I probably stay silent when I should speak up… I cant speak for all dudes on the planet, but just for me.. and Badass girls are pretty much the opposite of everything I just listed there.. they kick ass, without really knowing, or “conforming” to bounds.. they deal with alot of shit.. around the world, and from my experience theyre not really trying to “TAKE OVER”… its more about empowerment.. exposing stereotypes… activism.. its a sort of “fuck you” to the powers that shouldnt be, but are, and how said powers shut the mouths of victims, how they turn heads with lies, and a refusal to release real statistics, and studies about the harm that is being done in certain cultures, in certain countries, and how its become more and more acceptable.. (im hearing that No Doubt song in my head) I think theres alot more work to be done in the sense of evening out a playing field, I think its more about communication than anything else, and its funny to me because the communication isnt necessarily done with words, but with behavior… remember the tagline “well behaved women seldom make history?”  I know its been going on for a while, (See: Kathleen Hanna) but I think its time that a breakthrough is taking place, and we are seeing that statement come to pass -on a global level..   


18th of June, 2014.  

me.  May 2014

me in the Spring of 2014 


ive been listening to alot of country music lately, and ive been wanting to get some more tattoos.. ive been wanting to try and get better at tattooing other people, ive been wanting to renew my passport and go to another country, and meet some of these people ive been writing, and I want to go take more pictures in Brasov, Romania… and I remember how cool Mexico felt in the summer evenings, and sometimes at night.. I think about the food all around the world, and how much im missing just sitting here and being comfortable, just sitting here in my mid twenties, with nobody to really be responsible for, and all the beach trips im missing, and new music out there to hear.. I cant wait to go to school for my new career, and im hoping that this degree can sort of make all those things I listed begin to happen again, but in a much bigger way, in a totally new profession, in a new direction.  

so im going to keep drinking beer, im going to keep working hard and listening to country.. im going to keep looking at the pictures I took, and comparing them with how new all these places look now, and I can’t wait to return  


sometimes late at night, I wonder where the hell I’d be if I hadn’t heard the music I have.. 

without any warning

there’s nothing it won’t tell me… 

from your blackest moods

the very first to fade

spell of mercury