just woke up 

just woke up 

I really believe that something is written in the sky, and that it does for sure have to do with the movement of celestial bodies.. bodies guiding our own, explaining to some degree the over all energy of this universe.. ive had some personal experiences with it, ive had some incredible memories I will never forget that I could tie back to the position of certain planets, and what they mean on that particular day, and the list goes on when it comes to my appreciation, respect, and believe in/for Astrology.. right now the sun is in Aries, and typically the moon has been in Aries around this time of month at this time of year… and thats what im getting at… maybe not the whole archtype thing that everyone connects Tarot cards with.. no, I don’t think astrology deals with those, but I know that the houses, the bodies, the positions, whats across, all that.. I know it embodies something greater than the archetypes in the subconscious mind do, and I also cant deny the history in Astrology, and its relation to many, many holy texts.. if not all of them…
celestial bodies that have been around for thousands, millions of years, and the light traveling all those years at such a mind blowing speed.. its crazy to me, how related our people have been throughout history, throughout lifetimes.. and not in an overly grotesque Mel Gibson movie kinda way, where there’s like slaughter, and sacrifice and shit on top of pyramids during an eclipse, but more like a tranquil order to the Universe.. a sort of hierarchy, and meaning to all the stars and the paths they move on, the relationship they have with others, and how it affects us as magnetic beings on a supernatural, partially undiscovered planet called Earth.  

I really believe that something is written in the sky, and that it does for sure have to do with the movement of celestial bodies.. bodies guiding our own, explaining to some degree the over all energy of this universe.. ive had some personal experiences with it, ive had some incredible memories I will never forget that I could tie back to the position of certain planets, and what they mean on that particular day, and the list goes on when it comes to my appreciation, respect, and believe in/for Astrology.. right now the sun is in Aries, and typically the moon has been in Aries around this time of month at this time of year… and thats what im getting at… maybe not the whole archtype thing that everyone connects Tarot cards with.. no, I don’t think astrology deals with those, but I know that the houses, the bodies, the positions, whats across, all that.. I know it embodies something greater than the archetypes in the subconscious mind do, and I also cant deny the history in Astrology, and its relation to many, many holy texts.. if not all of them…

celestial bodies that have been around for thousands, millions of years, and the light traveling all those years at such a mind blowing speed.. its crazy to me, how related our people have been throughout history, throughout lifetimes.. and not in an overly grotesque Mel Gibson movie kinda way, where there’s like slaughter, and sacrifice and shit on top of pyramids during an eclipse, but more like a tranquil order to the Universe.. a sort of hierarchy, and meaning to all the stars and the paths they move on, the relationship they have with others, and how it affects us as magnetic beings on a supernatural, partially undiscovered planet called Earth.  

me, April 2014

me, April 2014


The Berlin Wall coming down, November 11, 1989

The Berlin Wall coming down, November 11, 1989

RIP Eric Glenn Harroun
(June 11,1982- April 8,2014)

Rest Easy

something that weighed heavy on me today, and one of the most difficult things to wrap a mind around is the fact that so many innocent men, women, and children.. non-combatants, and pets, and animals.. families… life that has been taken in remote parts of the world…

killed over ideas, and philosophies, foreign policies, and coalitions, and other government bullshit that said peoplecouldn’t understand… imagine trying to explain the Warsaw pact, or the Geneva Convention to a villager up somewhere near the eastern parts of the Congo?

How far do you think you could get with that?

what about just explaining it to like… half the people on the street?  have you ever seen those shows on t.v. where they go around and ask people some pretty simple questions about history, or who their senator is, and only maybe a third of them get it right?  Does NATO vs. Russia and America’s involvement in South America against Cuba even make sense to you?  Who is Henry Kissinger, and how does his passed work affect us today? 

Do you know?  

I’m struggling with these questions, for myself… as in… why does any of this shit have to matter?  none of these acts that people keep committing have ever solved anything.. and im not exclusively talking about violence and what not here.. but im talking about the basic Evil in people… We can’t even send over money or aid to “the poor” because our contributions are just helping the wealthy get more rich.. these little organizations are blowing more than half our donations to advertisement, and laughing all the way to the bank with their tax write off receipts, company gas cards…. why is it that people in Third World countries are killed over First World problems like ideology, and socioeconomic systems and shit?

who are “we” to decide what unhinges the balance in equality?

what the fuck?

   is it just me?  or… -imagine if we could save the lives of the tens of thousands of innocent people killed in Africa back in the early 90’s alone? imagine if we went further back than that.. and somehow preserved peace between the revolution in Iran, the war in Afghanistan by the Soviets, and even the bad shit that happened in Korea, and China in the 1950’s… okay, scratch all that, what if we could spare the lives of all the innocent between the years 2014 all the way back to 1901?… I mean, I know revolution needs to happen, but do people really have to die? and what if Communism, and AIDS, and all this other crazy shit never existed? what if people never had to die in the crossfire of some war between professional militaries that aren’t even from their continent? now im not speaking against the killing of the Wolves of the World.. im questioning the so called clean hands of some Sheep, and that’s not a euphemism for any one single nation.. there are many people groups from all over the World to blame for the shed of neutral life… 

   its a sad truth that war has been around since the early history of the World, and its sickening to witness agencies lying to Congress, and lying to the world’s people, and all 24/7 of the time we’re paying for this shit with our own money (a dollar that’s losing value)… its hard for me to see a balanced World without something serious going down first.. and reading the news, and looking at history, and examining how it repeats itself.. it’s tough for me to say (with confidence) that the World our children will live in has gotten better over the passed course of these few years… and im not trying to get all Winnie the Pooh, wishy-washy over things I can’t change, but I know everyone’s waking up, and smelling it in the air like I do… the world’s big change is coming, and it’s up to you and I to do the right thing when it happens, whatever that is anymore -in this corrupt ass place… cops fuckin’ shooting homeless people in New Mexico.  Giant planes carpet bombing schools, and churches.. Drones attacking weddings… planes disappearing and Casey Anthony adopting kids.. its all turned around, its all backwards, because crazy stories about Wal-Mart parking lots just reinforce how “normal” this twisted news is… another kid dies because of a disease pharmaceutical corporations are making money off of.. I love This Country, but this big business/corporate mentality, ridiculous government spending, and lazy ass people taking advantage of welfare, and handouts and all that bad karma we’re mining is gaining a collected illness of money, murder, and greed, and senators sleeping through meetings, and it just seems as though these problems are getting worse… little kids playing violent video games and doing crazy shit at their schools…

so with that, im going to end this short-winded rant, and say that if I ever prayed, I would pray that this shit would end, that this world would be different for our kids, and it would turn into something that we made together, that we could be proud of…

new art for my upcoming, and Fifth book 

www.gbd388.com

new art for my upcoming, and Fifth book 

www.gbd388.com

   After a day at Code Red Airsoft Park, there’s nothing like listening to the Beatles, and kicking back with a pizza in the oven, and a beer (Shocktop, rasberry) on my desk.  
   I’m about to re-watch Sons of Anarchy season 5, and possibly rack out early tonight.  I did a little work on my website yesterday, and of course im still working on my fifth book titled “In Your Name”… Looking at an August release date… 

   After a day at Code Red Airsoft Park, there’s nothing like listening to the Beatles, and kicking back with a pizza in the oven, and a beer (Shocktop, rasberry) on my desk.  

   I’m about to re-watch Sons of Anarchy season 5, and possibly rack out early tonight.  I did a little work on my website yesterday, and of course im still working on my fifth book titled “In Your Name”… Looking at an August release date… 

   I keep thinking about that flight where people lived after the crash for 60+ days.. they made that movie “Alive” based on it.. I know this is a whole different situation, but I still hold on to hope that there are survivors to this.. Im waiting to hear the best, and I know this is a sick world with real evil in it, but right now im choosing to believe that evil won’t win this time, that the good men and women in this World won’t let it take over. 

   I wouldn’t call it a prayer, but I would call it an ache.. and that’s an ache to believe in a World where all innocent life is preserved. 

   tonight/this morning, the fate of my countrymen, and fellow human beings are in my thoughts, and if I were to pray, it would be that the shitbags behind this possible atrocity will one day choke on their own blood in a place of separation from the surviving good in the World.. so right now, I say: We are thinking of you. Your life matters.

we’re talking real New York style pizza.  

Code Red Airsoft Park in Colton, California (Southern) 

new M4 

new M4 

I dont think Valentine’s day should be strictly thought of as a romantic type thing, but simply a day that you remember everyone you ever loved, and the place that they took in your life… people that are dead, people that you never met, people that you kicked on the ground… just anyone that’s ever had a place in your heart.. bullets in their heads, drunk or stoned out of their minds… it doesnt matter who they are.. just dont ever forget them, dont ever forget the role they played in your life… so, with that I mean this.. happy valentines day to all my friends, passed and present

   Just sent the email, and im sitting here, staring at the screen like she’s going to write back any second now.  

   My sister lives in Germany right now, and it fucking blows.

I havent seen her since May 5th, 2013.. and she wrote to me in boot camp, she was on face time when I got out.. but it’s not enough, because we used to go for long drives together, and talk about Tarantino films… she’s one of the funniest people I know, and her stories about Thailand, and Istanbul were incredible to hear, to look at the pictures she took from riding across town on her motorcycle, and all the crazy food she got to eat… I miss her, and im literally counting down the days until shes finally home